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PRESIDENT'S PRATTLE MAY 2014

 

WINTER INDOOR SEASON

Our Indoor Finals Competitions produced some interesting and well fought games with the following results :-

  Winners Runners Up
Mens Singles Peter Boyle Dale Hall
     
Ladies 4 Wood Singles Caroline Bloomfield Sue Stewart
     
Phelps Trophy Peter Boyle Othman Sharif
     
Ladies 2 Wood Singles Eileen O'Shea Sue Stewart
     
Mens  2 Wood Pairs Sam Watts Geoff Powell
  Dale Hall Andy Crawley
     
Ladies Pairs Lesley Storer Sandra Simpson
  Eileen O'Shea Mavis Hale
     
Mixed Pairs Jan Gore John Stacey
  Othman Sharif Liz Sims
     
Mens Triples Othman Sharif Sam Watts
  Graham Kerr Adie Twinn
  Brian Eastgate Adie Kemish
     
Mixed 2 Wood Triples Graham Kerr Brian Bloomfield
  Andy Crawley Alan Scholan
  Lesley Storer Caroline Bloomfield
     

                                            

Well done everyone for reaching the finals and not forgetting those of us who were knocked out by the above players - without us there would not be a competition!!!  So keep entering and trying - it will be your turn one day.

The Champion of Champions was contested by 7 out of the 9 winning League teams and I am very pleased to report that my team, the Panthers (Thursday Morning League) emerged the winners for the second year running, defeating Phil Blackman's team, the Has Beens (Monday Midday League), in the final.

The Final of the Tens Competition was hotly fought by Didcot and ourselves with Didcot emerging the winners after a nail biting finish all hanging on the last end of the triples game.  Great stuff - well done Didcot.  The trophy and prize monies were presented by Mr. Paul Holt of the Newbury Building Society who have sponsored this very popular Inter-Club Competition since its inception in the 2003/4 indoor season and to whom we are most grateful.

Our very grateful thanks also go to Rosemary and Peter Phelps who have organised this competition from the word go and have spent a good deal of time and effort in the brilliant smooth running of this event for us, not to mention giving up their Sunday mornings for the last 11 indoor seasons.  They have now decided the time has come to step down and from next season Sylvia and Alan Holmes will be taking up the reins of the Tens Competition.  Welcome aboard both of you.   Once again, thank you so much Rosemary and Peter.  You can now lie in on Sunday mornings!!

 

SUMMER INDOOR SEASON

This is now under way with Triples being played on Monday and Thursday mornings (everyone welcome - 10 a.m. start) and a Summer League on Wednesday mornings.

 

OUTDOOR SEASON

The Outdoor Season is now also under way for those hardy souls who brave the English weather! 

Well done to the men's A and B league teams who both got through to the third round in the League Cup.  The A team then had a very good win against Carterton B and now go forward to the Semi-Final which will be played in August.   Keep it up lads.  The B team faced Headington A in their third round match who proved to be too strong for us. Hard luck gentlemen but well done on getting through to the Quarter Finals.

We have also played and won our first mixed game of the season against Witney Town which was very well supported by members.  Our Captains - Brian, Colin and Shirley much appreciate that support so keep it going for all our matches.  We need you!!!

Regrettably the usual official opening of the greens, with bowls drive and match, planned for Sunday 27th April had to be cancelled through lack of numbers.  The season seems to commence so early these days and as 2 mens league games and a mixed match had already taken place, perhaps players felt they had no need of any more practice!!!

We went to Marlow on Saturday 5th May with 5 rinks of men but only 1 rink of ladies and had a most enjoyable afternoon there - good weather, good green, good food and excellent company.  (Oh! And we won on all rinks!).  Ladies where were you?  You don't know what you missed.  We should have had 2 rinks and could only muster 1 - very disappointing for us and for Marlow.

 

OUTDOOR CLUB COMPETITIONS

Entry forms for all Club competitions are now on the notice boards so grab a form and give it a go - you never know your luck and it's all good experience.  Closing date for entries is 18th May and finals will be held over the weekend of 6th &  7th September 2014.

 

CLUB NIGHT

The first Summer Club Night is on Friday 6th June starting at 6 p.m. with both  indoor and outdoor bowls available. There will be the usual scrumptious BBQ with entertainment by 'Summit' during the evening - all for £5.50.  Great value.

 

 

How  about this one !

A woman comes home and says to her husband "Remember those headaches I've been having all these years?  Well, they're gone".

"No more headaches?" says the husband.  "What happened"

His wife replies "Margie referred me to a hypnotist.  He told me to stand in front of a mirror and say "I do not have a headache, I do not have a headache, I do not have a headache.  It worked!  The headaches have all gone".

The husband replies "Well, that is wonderful".

His wife then says "You know you haven't been exactly a ball of fire in the bedroom these last few years.  Why don't you go and see the hypnotist and see if he can do anything for that?"  The husband agrees to try it.

Following his appointment, the husband comes home, rips off his clothes, picks his wife up and carries her into the bedroom.  He puts her on the bed and says "Don't move, I'll be right back".  He goes into the bathroom, returns a few minutes later, jumps into bed and makes passionate love to his wife like never before.

His wife says "Boy, that was wonderful".

The husband says "Don't move, I'll be right back".

He goes back into the bathroom, and when he returns, round two is even better than the first time.  The wife sits up and her head is spinning.  Her husband again says "Don't move, I'll be right back" and goes into the bathroom. This time, his wife quietly follows him and there in the bathroom she sees him standing at the mirror saying

"She's not my Wife".

"She's not my Wife".

"She's not my Wife".

 

His funeral's next week!!

 

 

President Margaret.

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